A MONTH IN WALES

It's been about a month since my last update on here. Last time I talked about the move to Wales from the USA and how difficult that was. I have to admit, it hasn't necessarily gotten easier, but there is a bit more familiarity now. Early on after my dad left, I would wake up in the morning thinking I was hearing Milo and would get confused about where I woke up. That was hard.

A recent update I had to share was that I found a home! I am really happy to now be living in Penarth, a little seaside town just a few minutes outside Cardiff. I went the other day to explore the local area and found myself at the Esplanade and pier. I felt very emotional as soon as the sea air hit my nose. There is something so nostalgic about being by the sea for me since I grew up on Anglesey (an island). I felt so happy in that moment and completely free. I obviously have to do everything alone but I didn't mind that day. I took in the moment completely and found a spot to sit on the steps leading to the stony beach. Later, I grabbed a coffee from the pier café and perched on a bench for a little to enjoy. It really was a special day and, honestly, the best day I have had here so far. Penarth seems like such a lovely little town and I am excited to explore more. Next on my list is to go to Alexandra Park and to get a library card from the local library.

My house wasn't easy to get. Even though I am renting, it was so incredibly difficult just with the lack of financial presence over here in the UK. Thankfully my grandparents stepped in and helped basically vouch for me. My house is small but has so much potential to be a cozy little nook. It is right on the Penarth marina so I get to wake up to the most magnificent view... and I am excited to do that soon. I have met two neighbors so far and was told that there's a quiz night at the local seafood restaurant each month. I am also down the road from a little pub. It is really the perfect place to start the life I would like to live.

A little story about that... in addition to the logistical difficulty of getting the house, I also had a crisis of conscience with it. I had been asked to apply for another house. I did because, like the US life I had, options were limited. The landlord wanted me to rent. I viewed the house for a second time but I just didn't feel like it was home to me. On paper, it was cheaper, bigger, had an ensuite, a huge garden for Milo. and separate kitchen and dining. I remember sitting at the table in the Air BnB and shedding a few tears because here I was with the first decision I could actually make but I was torn between head and heart. In the end, I went with the illogical choice -- the heart choice -- and chose the small, more expensive, no garden for Milo option. Probably stupid? Yes, but I had reasons.

When I lived in the US and was well aware of what was going to happen to my life I settled my anxiety and heartache with the fact that I could live the small and quiet simple life that I craved. I didn't need much but I just really wanted a chance to be happy. I hadn't been for a very long time. I wanted every choice to be mine because it could be. In the USA, every choice (large choices in life I mean) were made for me. I had to take certain jobs, I had to move certain places, I had to have a job to keep a visa, I could never just quit or leave to fulfill something else. Nothing was ever that simple. When I viewed the Penarth house, I felt that those things I wanted could be mine and that's why I chose it. Even though the cost to furnish it is crazy since I couldn't bring anything with me but three suitcases, I am excited to make it feel like home. More so, for Milo to finally get here soon (I hope!) and we can make it home together. I miss my best friend more than words.

I am hoping now that the big causes for concern when I moved here are sorted, life will get a bit easier, that it will have more purpose, and, ultimately, that it will become happier. I am trying really hard to make that happen - I went to my beloved National Trust properties right away when I got here (a longing for years in the US) and I chose the house that had the potential to be the life I wanted. Every day I do something wrong or something goes wrong but I am proud of the choices I've made so far. I can almost see my life becoming greater. I turn 30 in a few days so another hope is that the upheaval twenties chapter will close and lead into a new renaissance.

Thanks for the support and love. It means more than you know, that I can promise you. I have more good news to share soon, so stay tuned :)

Some photos of the last few weeks. Hope you enjoy!