*I am the nutty professor, just FYI*
I wasn't trying to become a teacher. Then, one fateful day in June 2016, my former graduate professor emailed me and told me to apply for "this job". The job turned out to be a Lecturer position in Fashion at the University of Tennessee at Martin. I had never heard of Martin before, but I figured she wouldn't steer me wrong. A week or so later I was on a plane to a small town in West Tennessee to interview and a month after that I moved to Tennessee to start teaching in a university at the age of twenty-four.
Any teacher will tell you that the job has its ups and downs. For me, the downs were dealing with levels of poor confidence and establishing with some students that, despite my age, I knew what I was doing. The ups have been extensive. Perhaps the greatest joy is students inviting you to be part of their lives -- sharing family photos and stories, success stories, new jobs, engagements, weddings, babies. It really is so special.
I am not an expert at teaching; far from it in fact, but these are the little tidbits I've learned over the past four years:
Teaching is eliminating "what would I do?" from your brain completely.
At the beginning, I often had moments of questioning why students would do an assignment that way or not get that answer or not do something this way because that's how I did it back when I was an undergrad. Well, everyone's story and learning capabilities are unique. Everyone's thought processes are different and people navigate challenges differently. I'll be frank, I was a "textbook" student in a lot of ways. I made one C in 6 years of higher education and I was pretty much by the book with attendance and assignments. I have come to recognize that other students are not, and although I can have high expectations of them, it has to be based on their potential, not my experience. I learned that super quickly but I think, as a teacher, it has to be something you consistently remind yourself of.
You have to role model
This one is hard as I am usually a hypocrite in a lot of the outside lessons I teach my students. Nonetheless, I encourage them to be the opposite of me in every way. I have made them write kind notes about themselves to stick on their mirrors. I encourage them to write notes to their classmates. I don't tolerate any negative speak about themselves. I realized a few years ago that there's a lot in this area that I suck at -- truly -- but I don't want them to be women heading into the world who are not confident of sharing what they know, who aren't capable of lifting others on the way to the top or who aren't confident of going after their dreams. My hope is that they will leave my class with knowledge of fashion, but also knowledge of how to advocate for themselves in the world and why it is important.
Sometimes you are more than a teacher
Most surprising to me is the level of open-heartedness that students bring to you. I went to a big school so I never had any interaction with my professors about 80% of the time. Even if we had exam questions, we had to ask one of the five Teaching Assistants. I wasn't used to students actually wanting to talk to me or to share their lives. I didn't expect to get to hold my student's newborn babies or to hug them when they cried or to celebrate with them when they hit a milestone. I didn't know I could be any more a part of their life than just "their teacher" and I feel so honored when I have students add me on Facebook and share their life updates with me.
You learn too
We teach, but I don't think you can really be a teacher without consistent learning. I don't mean learning Canvas or Zoom. I mean learning about yourself. I remember being in my office before my first ever lecture and thinking, "What the hell am I doing here? I can't speak in front of people." I was a nervous wreck and I still get nervous on the first day of each semester, but I learned that I can speak in front of people. I can present in conferences on my own. I learned I can be more empathetic and understanding. I learned I can be a more supportive person. I learned I can always know more about fashion. I learned I can become more extroverted. I learned that I can.
I can pass these lessons on as I learn them. I can tell my students my mistakes and what I have learned. There is no excuse for not attempting to learn on a frequent basis. Willful ignorance is not a welcome trait in education and I don't think it should be for us teachers either.
In short...
I am so grateful for these past four years. Man, I love my students. I am so honored to have been a small part of their story and to be able to continue keeping up with some of them. It is a large part of the joy in my life to be able to serve them. I don't know why I ended up Martin, TN. After all, I wasn't trying to be a teacher, but I am so happy I did. I will miss everyone endlessly but I thank them for changing my life for the better.
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